if you don't know what you want you end up with alot you don't

Some people would say that when two individuals get married throughout the course of the marriage these two individuals do not remain the same two individuals that they were when they first got married. Because people are constantly changing but the fact would elude more true for younger individuals. So it's safe to say that whilst you're dating or in whatever series that the relationship is at that you are in fact liable to change at some point. Some people do put on a mask only allowing their significant other to see all the traits that they would believe will impress them. I can honestly say that I have never been that person to hold back my true self to impress someone I was in a relationship with. I believe that if I appear to good to be true in the beginning it's only because of the elements. Which can be environment and people at the certain point in time. If we're only going out and hanging out in controlled environments. I reasonably assume that there won't be anything to cause me to have a negative reaction. However, as time progresses and we get familiar with other elements and you seem my reaction to something seem less has traffic for example. Now my impatience is magnified. So you could say I don't like waiting . I would rather wake up hours before I'm suppose to be somewhere just to avoid traffic or if I know something has to be done in advance. I won't take the chance of being late or getting caught in traffic. Even if just the same the traffic didn't cause my tardiness. I don't like traffic. If I believe that I am going to inconvenience someone I would let them know in advance as to prepare or I will find an alternative. It is in fact true that if you don't have a plan you are willing to go in any direction. I am a purposed being. Moving without purpose makes me feel out of my element.

"Change is envitable, growth is intentional"

-Herbert Otto

I believe in chivalry. I am in love with the classic gentleman the guy that will open the car door for me, pull out my chair, call in on me to see if I'm alright, check the hood of my car, thoughtful things like that. Most if not all woman can appreciate a man like that because many do not exist today. I too appreciate all this while maintaining my independence. If a guy doesn't do all these things and more for me while getting to know him. I can only over look it for a short while it is safe to say this wouldn't be a long-term relationship. Not to say that I will have nothing to do with a guy that doesn't spoil me on the contrary. I appreciate a thoughtful spirit because I am one. I would want to associate with someone who takes my best interest into concern in every aspect because I chose to make my significant other a priority in my life. I should never feel like a choice in theirs. Sometimes people do forget or miss but if something is apart of your nature I don't believe that there is an excuse. Sometimes becoming acquainted to a new way of doing takes some time. I can attest to this because of my own personal experience. But I wouldn't require someone to become what I want. I appreciate individuals being themselves even if I don't like it. There will always be someone that appreciates them for the qualities they possess. I don't believe that I am a high-maintenance person or hard to please. I do believe that alot of persons are just low-maintenance in themselves. They want a mate that is always there for them on a daily-basis and especially in times of need but they cannot reciprocate in the same way. Some mates fail to see the significance of the smallest deeds in the everyday life of relationships. I suppose this what can be considered as complacency. A relationship should never become complacent. If it does failure is inevitable.

"Nothing of me is original I am the combined effort of everybody I've known."

-Chuck Palahniuk

In my opinion relationships are the highest order of human interaction because all human interaction is in fact relationship that can be classed into personal and impersonal ones. In my own personal relationship with the opposite sex I have never until this point in my life had a plan for what I wanted out of a relationship prior to being in one. In the past I would make known what I stood for and what I wouldn't stand for only when I saw that which I didn't and did want. Which lead to disaster because that person was already set in their ways and my silence all the time before was approval. I believe in the positive change of an individual but a person has to truly want that for themself first before another person can ever benefit from it. I like many have been hurt by past relationships for that same reason. You cannot allow someone to back you emotionally into a corner and not counteract their actions before it gets to the point where you become hurt by it.

"Know yourself, master yourself, conquest of self is most gratifying."

-Unknown Author

In these past months I have become a very different individual in regard to relationships. A type of commitment that I said I did not want but by means I still cannot explain have committed myself to. I believe that everyone comes into our lives for reasons. Some short term and some long term. But nonetheless with the purpose though not known to most to teach a lesson. Sometimes we then cause these individuals to go contrary to their purpose when we ourselves do not know when to let go or perhaps let go too soon. But life is a continual teacher and we learn from our mistakes and sometimes too that of others. Sometimes I can be impatient. Sometimes I am rude. Sometimes I do not think before I speak. Sometimes I do not think before I act. Sometimes I am easily angered. Sometimes I am inconsiderate. Sometimes I am too easy going. Yet all the time I am myself. I appreciate people who appreciate me for the qualities I possess. Those that are permanent and those that are temporary qualities. I live now with a plan and purpose for my life. Letting it be known what I will and will not stand for. When we're young we all assume that we have so much time. I'm still learning that this is not the case. None of us know the time of our own death or the coming of Christ. I live my life to the fullest and without regret. I only apologize for the mistakes along the way I am certain to make that will sometimes affect the ones I love. God is merciful and faithful to carry me over those paths that I stumble as I ask his forgiveness.

"Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

-Philippians 3: 12-14