Addiction...

So I'm addicted to many things..both positive and maybe not so positive but never anything negative... with that being said..My sister's suppose to be back home for good next week...And being the wonderful person she is she sent a shout-out to me... do you want me to bring you anything back?!...omg?! do you even have to ask...lol. Anyway, I'm finally getting the Nokia 7373...after almost an entire year of extensive reviews and study the best critic is MYSELF...I have to find out if this phone functions as faboulous and delicious as it looks...yes! they are the only words worthy of such description...It's actually in only two stores here and it's been $600 bucks from I first laid eyes on it which was before Christmas last year and the only decrease in price barely worthy of mention was Valentine's Day this year when it actually dropped to $420 and then skyrockedtted again..I almost lost myself a few times and paid that type of money for it...But with my luck with cell phones...that would have been short-lived..Of course I found it online for alot less months ago but the opportunity had not present itself...patience is a virtue these words never spoken so truly...FINALLY.....I hope I don't jinx it...Can't wait to have the little seduction in my hands...Did I fail to menion the most important detail about it?! ....it's PINK....could it be any tastier?!...ugh! anticipation!!!!one week!! I'd like to give much thanx to Gustave...Hanna...Ike...and Josephine too...lol @ least only for now b/c of them my sister can't make it back until next week...giving the awesome ppl who work for Ebay Express time to get on top of things.... this is my addiction....

Femme fatale...

Gawd!! I just feel like I'm in this bitch mode...everyone's so dramtic about everything!! From that shit over a month ago where I almost lost gawd knows what...lol....geez! I'm sooo over it....though it's not completly over...but I so don't need everyone's false pity and all the "if I were there...."and the "how could you....." and the "why are you....". uGH!! so frustrating I just want to scream at the top of my lungs... I don't need all that blah blah...if I wanted to hear what everyone had to say I would friggin' ask...Just the fact that I'm not talking or asking any of your guys about is...you'd think it would be enough to hint hint....back the fcuk up ay!!! The most annoying part of it all, is everyone asking to the same drawn out details over and over again. And like who's asking anybody to take sides?! I'm not looking for supporters to rally in my defense. When it's all said and done regardless of what the outcome is...it was MY choice and nooone else's. I don't get where ppl get off being so judgemental...I ALWAYS mind my own business...not like all their lives are perfect or can they even speak from experience and even so, how could anyone ever understand?! it didn't happen to you...you can't understand how I FEEL!!!! Then there're these labourers....are we here to be personal or professional...what the hell is there not something called procedure?! And you want to get all teary eyed over a few questions and a call. ..I swear these ppl are too sheltered...get some bloody backbone mayne!!!then ppl want to look at me like im some cold-hearted person...dayumm man I'm not looking for pity from anybody...I don't go running to someone with my problems every little second of everyday...do these ppl not kno what is to deal on their own shyte...its so pathetic to want to make every casual encounter or aquintance your BFF....omg!! get a fcukin' life ppl!!! are there not more important things going on in the world let alone our very own country to be touched about?!....And what I REALLY don't appreciated is in all aspects of it ppl wanted to "TALK" to you...knowing in all regards that whatever you say to them even in the most insiginificant and non-literal sense they have no intention of keeping any of it confidential...they're just their to feed the masses with more slander..just to make themselves feel like they're doing some justice by acting nice and looking down on the life of another..only because you don't think and act the same why they do...are we not in global society of individuality..where ppl define themselves..going against every sterotype and norm to whatever means all in the name of personal conquest...when it all comes down to it...that's all everyone is trying to do..figure out this thing we called life for themselves...even if they're stumbling and being brusied along the way..and to those that keep walking with your heads held high and not genuwinely giving a care to those who don't necessarily get it on their first, second, third or however many times it takes...keep your bitchassness the fcuk away from me!!!!self-righteous motherfuckers!! THEN there are those so called friends that slowly omit you from their lives ONLY to be heard from when they need something and in the end they want you to believe it's your fault b/c you've put someone else above them...like wtf...this was never a competition...ive taken my share of bad treatment in that department..yet i keep a genuwine smiling face...ive never claimed to be perfect..in fact if i had a disclaimer it would probably read...not the girl your mom warned you about, her imagination was never this good...lol..that being said, i give ppl all the fair chances in the world and yet i still get burned... and no ill never be bitter.. what i would appreciate tho is for ppl to give me the same diligence i give them...but yea you can't alway get what you want..haha...so what if you miss a time or two.. a call or text....for everytime that it ever counted i was there and all the times you shit on me while i was there....and i never threw it in your face or held no annomosity towards you..yet now you take the easy way out when you think someone else has your back...more power to you...ill never be in a position to hold anyone back from being human... that being the ability to chose your own will...i will never be that person...i am not misery..and if you're one of the bright crayons in the box you'll know what the means...i kno that i am still the same girl that loves a good stomach turning laugh...the ones that bring happy tears to my eyes...i still enjoy feeling the rain on my face ...and the sand between my toes...i still love the feeling of the waves washing over me, and the sun hitting my brown skin, shaking my hair againt the wind, getting dressed up and the only memory of a perfect time is the internal one in my mind..i still crave wet kisses and long hugs that lift my spirit in the air...i love this life...i'm flying!!!!!!!